Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What are some common historical misconceptions?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What legal actions can be taken if a neighbor's unleashed dog causes harm or injury?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

States With the Most Generous Tippers - Newser

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Why are most girls not open to the idea of anal sex?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

How does it feel to be in a marriage without any love?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I can read

I feel like my boyfriend doesn't love me. Why?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Who are some good social skills therapists in Pompano Beach, Florida?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I can count

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

What are mean nicknames to call my sister? She is always so mean to me.

I actually pay taxes

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Here's Why This Year Will Be "Different" For Taylor Swift And Travis Kelce - BuzzFeed

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand how hurricane paths work

How can a native English speaker say "it was nice talking to you" in French without using that exact phrase?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

What is the definite integral of x^x from 0 to 2?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy bullshit

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Why is my ex trying to provoke an argument with me?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

NASA spots Martian volcano twice the height of Mount Everest bursting through the morning clouds: Space photo of the week - Live Science

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

How mentally ill are Republicans who think Trump is mentally sane? He literally said immigrants eat pets.

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for fakery

I see through liars

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have complete contempt for traitorism

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t cotton to rapists

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have a reading level above third grade

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t